Time For a Life Story

If you logged on today looking for a content, uplifting post, you're out of luck. Try my top 100 music videos or something. Today I'm going to talk about the past. In fact, I'm going to focus on one date, October 2nd.

I'll start as far back as I remember, year three. Let's see, it was 9 years ago, I'd moved to Abbots Langley from South Oxhey in April, finished year 2 at Oxhey Wood primary school and started year 3 at Leavesden Green. The kids in my class had been together since year 1, they were close. I wasn't made to feel very welcome by them at all, although my teacher did try. Throughout the year, I only made two major friends, one of which left in year 5, only to return in year 9 as a total prick. The other friend was the first friend I made at the school. As for the girls, they took pleasure in tormenting me for the entire year, so yes, I was bullied. Anyway, returning to our magic date: I only had one friend and as a child, I was extremely excited that my birthday was fast approaching. The day came, and my friend didn't, he was ill. I spent the entire day either alone or being tormented by my bullies. I can't remember which, but at eight years old, I'm not sure which is worse.

In year 5, I just wanted to invite the "cool kids", so they could use me for a good day out. In year seven, I only really had two friends, I can't even remember what happened.

Skipping to the end (or close to it anyway): Year 10, I had my first "real" girlfriend (meaning local and lasting more than a week), had my mates round for the day, and to be honest, we just played games and I got touched by some slut, not realising how I looked to my friends at all. Year 11: The girl that I was so tragically in love with decided to totally ignore the fact that I existed for the day, just to prove some twisted point. The following day, we all went bowling, but everything was falling apart: my girlfriend and two of my friends split from the main group and that was that, depression.

So, "how does this story end?" I hear you screaming, begging for a lovely ending. Although, I think you all know I've already set the tone for a tragedy. September 2009: Things couldn't be better. I had my best friends, all five of them. Nothing was wrong at all. Emma had her birthday on the 14th, leaving me to step up next. Everybody kept telling me "You HAVE to do something on your birthday!" and I believed them.

I started arranging, I'd been arranging everything else all year but it was decided that I'd have to arrange my birthday too. So I started. I decided what to do (a meal). I started looking at the places, they were either too expensive, not to everyone's likes, not vegetarian etc. Eventually we half decided on one, this was about two days ago. It had been hell, I was at the end of my tether and quite happy that we were sorted. Then I found out that everyone couldn't do Friday (October 2nd), some people still wanted Friday, others wanted Thursday. Today, on September 26th (which is a date I don't really like anyway), I cancelled my birthday plans.

Let's face it, half of my friends didn't even know what date my birthday was anyway, and I regret telling them. I didn't really want to celebrate it either, due to reasons revealed here, in this post. I'm sorry if you don't like it, I'm sorry if I'm being a selfish twat, but I thought my birthday was the one day of the year where it was about me, not about me going through hell arranging something for everyone else. I just want a break, and it doesn't feel right to have to arrange that break myself. If anything, I wanted a break from arranging plans. Sorry people, it's off, I don't want to hear anymore about it and I don't want anything from you. I don't even want to hear a "happy birthday" on the day, that's what will make my birthday a happy one. Thanks for listening, I hope you understand now.